By: Imelda
When people ask me why I’m leaving Toronto again, I sometimes joke that moving so often as a child has made me restless. However, the real reason is that I have been following a series of promptings and the doors have simply opened outside my hometown. Each move has been a mini leap of faith and the more steps I make, the more I am convinced that it is truly God who is leading me.
I wasn’t always so sure that God cared what I did with my life. Five years ago I thought I had fallen out of His will by failing Him in some way and deeply doubted that He would repurpose my life. I had reached a dead-end in my education and thus career path, at least, as far as I could see, and I parted ways with someone close to me who had had a profound impact on my life. I was discouraged and heartbroken. What had I done wrong? If I hadn’t done anything wrong, then why had God allowed these things to happen? I was angry but received no clear answers. I threatened to go my own way but the Spirit that stirred within me whispered, “will you still follow Me?” I was reminded of the prayer I had made when I was eight – “It is I, Lord. Send me!” They say you should be careful about what you pray for! What could I do but follow?
After a period of doubts, setbacks, and battles with personal demons, I am glad I can say that I am currently having a moment of clarity. Although I know there is much more to come, I am grateful for the certainty of knowing that I am in the right place right now. God has provided for my spiritual, emotional, and physical needs here in Vancouver through a housemate from ETCBC, a great place to live, a coincidental first meeting with a kindred spirit, an unsolicited prayer for faith from a pastor who didn’t know me, and more. These things provide me with enough assurance right now to believe that God is present in my journey. Friends, remind me of this moment if I ever forget. And I pray that if any of you feels alone or forgotten, you will have the same reassurance that God never leaves His people. He may be silent but He is never absent. And He will always give you enough.